Contest
Dear McCrappiacs,
I am holding a contest, winner gets a 6-er (or a volumetric/cost/awesomeness equivalent) of local brew from CA. I will decide the winner(s) based on some sort of purely subjective, biased analysis. Below are several odd news stories/pics, your job is to either makeup an appropriate quote for the article, or an appropriate caption for a picture. Multiple submissions are allowed, winner will be announced on 2/17/10.
Categories: DaCunha
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Re: Pic
“Alejandro gets served by Billy the Breakdancing Bull, in a scene described this past Saturday as ‘The crushed final dream of a flamboyant catamite-turned-matador’”
Article two
“Friend and neighbor John says ‘I didn’t realize his love of dogs would lead to such an ironic death’”
Article one
“South African Santa Claus detained while making belated Christmas deliveries to adults who were naughty this past year”
Pic
“Phil and Antonio suddenly had an ominous feeling when the bull did a back flip that giving it crystal meth might not have been the best praticle joke they could have played on Rodrigo”
ROFL.
Nice job guys, 2 more days and someone gets beer! I made ~19 gallons of home-brew this past weekend, so that is probably what the winner will get. I had access to some pretty sweet equipment to run the process, so I am anticipating some delicious product. It’s triple hopped (perle/cascade) pale ale (not IPA), made from 3 types of grain and a whole lotta love. Should be ready next weekend.
On another note – I’m a little disappointed with the number of submissions…is McCrappy dying a slow death? I thought FREE BEER might revitalize it, at least for a little bit…
Maybe you should leave it open for a couple more days. McCrappy has been quiet for a long time, maybe we just need a couple of days for poeple to check in.
BTW-you should send me your beer even if I don’t win, it sounds really good
Ok, I extended the contest, since the beer probably won’t be bottled/kegged off by the announcement anyway. Hopefully we can get a few more submissions.
Article 1:
It was later found that 12 additional children had been thrown out of the vehicle upon approaching the checkpoint, apparently in hopes of reducing fines. While fines will be based on the count found inside the vehicle and will not count the two dead children inside the glovebox, the driver is still likely to face fines as high as one million Rand ($12 USD).
Three of the children also face fines for driving under the influence, as two inebriated children, ages 4 and 6, were being used to operate the accelerator and brake pedals and one 5-year-old was controlling the steering wheel.
(fictitious exchange rate for dramatic effect)
Photo:
At the 167th annual bull headstand competition, Bodacious showcases a nearly perfect hornstand, which he was able to maintain for 12 minutes and 19 seconds. The current world record is held by a bull named Chaco who was able to hold a hornstand for nearly 15 minutes, incidentally while drinking beer directly from the faucet of a keg.
Photo:
In the latest scientific study of animal dynamics, it was found that bulls do not always land on their feet when dropped from a plane. In 210 tests conducted by researchers at the Budget Research University of Tijuana, it was found that only in approximately 2% of tests do bulls land on their feet.
Photo:
“The I.C.B.S. (International Cartwheeling Bull Society) North American Championships were postponed today only one day after having started. The delay comes due to a wild rogue matador which somehow entered the competition arena, causing confusion and panic among the competitors and spectators. How the matador entered the arena, or where the matador came from is still under investigation. Unfortunately, shortly after he entered the competition field, he wandered into the path of last year’s champion – Bullshakalaka III, and had to be put down. Bullshakalaka III was noticably shaken by the intrusion in his routine saying, “I can’t sleep, I can’t eat, all I can see is a small flamboyant matador staring at me in my dreams.”
The I.C.B.S. has not yet announced when the competition will resume.
Article 2:
“Dog: Man’s BF
F.Photo:
Being a huge sci-fi dork, the matador thinks to himself, “Wow, this reminds me of that scene in Lord of the Rings II where Gondor catapults a huge boulder into the Orks and the Urukai commander steps to the left at the last minute. Coincidental? I think not.”
And the WINNER IS:
EVERYONE!
Send me your addresses at my gmail addy, and I will get them out to you this week. Thanks to everyone who played!
well, as no one has sent me an email except for Chris, he will get some beer. The rest of you have until I finish drinking it.
Just a quick update: The beer kind of fizzled out, so I added some secret ingredients to help jump-start it up. Supposedly, it is now done fermenting and I will be bottling soon. After I taste it and approve I will ship. If it is bad, I am doing another different batch this Saturday, so either way I’ll have some beer out to you.
mmm… delicious belated beer…
@Dacunha
Marge Simpson: Where did you get all the money?
Grandpa: The government. I didn’t earn it. I don’t need it. But, if they miss one payment I’m gonna raise hell!